Teenagers will test you. They'll try out bad language and bad behavior at home, just like little kids will try out potty language at home. They know you won't disown them. It's a safe place. Nevertheless, even if you won't disown them, it's important for you to respond consistently: "We don't talk like that around here." If the bad language doesn't gain them anything and doesn't create a scene, they're more likely to stop using it.

If you ask a group of kids how you should handle your niece, one of them will probably say, "Don't send any more presents." My advice is a little softer. I suggest you let the niece know that you're expecting a thank you for your gift this year -- and if there is none, you won't be sending gifts in the future.

Your child should be able to sit through an entire meal by the time she's seven or eight. When she's younger, she can sit for a portion of the meal. If she gets fussy and restless, you can excuse her from the table. It works well if you set up a play area near the table so you can keep track of her and so you can expose her to the social interactions at the dinner table.

You'll have to start by talking to your son. You can't talk about this in the middle of a whining event. Try it at a different time. An 8-year-old is old enough to control his behavior; so as soon as the behavior stops working, he will let it go. Tell him that the whining is too much, that it happens every time he doesn't get what he wants and it's not going to work any longer. Be perfectly clear. Say, "We don't whine any more."

You can start when they are infants. Begin by establishing a culture of respect and consideration early on. You can do this by showing respect and consideration for everyone (including the baby) in the household. "Please" and "thank you" go a long way to creating that atmosphere of respect. "Please" turns a demand into a request and "thank you" shows appreciation. Requests and appreciation are essential parts of a culture of respect and consideration. So make it a habit.