I thought that guilt trips were supposed to go the way of the dinosaur when we declared a cease fire in the Mommy Wars (and does anybody REALLY believe the Mommy Wars are behind us?). Working Moms looking down their noses at Stay-at-Home-Moms as the lazy, slothful, unambitious wretches that wrecked everything that feminists had worked so hard for. The SAHMs of the world united against Working Moms as selfish money grubbers who put their own needs above the needs of their families and kid themselves into thinking that daycare is actually good for their children! Oh yes, at the height of the Mommy Wars there was plenty of guilt to go around. And it was women guilting other women! What happened to the concept of sisterhood?

But today, for a new breed of working mother, those striving to have some semblance of having it all by working, but working flexible hours and working from home the majority of their time, there is a new breed of guilt inducers. They come wrapped in a deceptively cute package, with big eyes, adorably irresistible mannerisms, and the sweet smell of lavender bubble wafting about them (or that sweet puppy dog smell on days when they've been outside). Yes. I'm talking about our kids. I have seen the enemy, and the enemy is my own sweet, precious children.

Our Hybrid Mom CEO, Stacey Smith, and I were recently on a business call. We were strategizing and forecasting, just like big girls...uh...um...I mean business women, and then came the cry from her daughter -- "Mommy...push me on the swing!" About the same time my two ragamuffins burst into my office whining, "We're hungry. You NEVER feed us." Stacey and I had to laugh. She told me of her son's recent outburst that "all she ever did was sit at the computer and work!" The funny thing is, he said this after having just spent an hour at the park -- with his mother's full attention. My son pulled a doozy the other day. I told him I needed 15 minutes for a quick phone call. His reply? "You're always on the phone. Why do you have to spend all your time on the phone?" And this was after a summertime full of lazy days at the swimming pool, regular excursions to the beach, and more games of Memory than I care to recall.

What is wrong with these children? Don't they understand the sacrifices we've made for them? Don't they know how lucky they are that they have moms who are trying desperately to put the needs of their children first and still have something for themselves? Don't they get the fact that we are engaged in a revolution here for crying out loud?

They don't. Children are, as I mentioned earlier, masters of manipulation. They know how to let tears well in their eyes. They know how to poke their lips out at just the right angle to look their most wounded. They are, by their very natures and stage in development, only concerned about what they need and what they want. And they ALWAYS talk in absolutes. You always... You never... And somehow, instinctively, they know how shoot their darts right into your Achilles heel. They go for your weakest spot and the place where you feel most vulnerable. That nagging question of "Am I a good mother?"

Yes. You're a good mother. I'm a good mother. Stacey's a good mother. I do feed my children. Most days I actually serve three meals! Stacey pushes her daughter in the swing regularly and spends plenty of time on the floor playing games with her son. They don't appreciate it now. But I have faith that the day will come when our children look at us and thank us for the sacrifices we made, the work that we did (and the work that didn't get done because we were making their costume for the school play and volunteering for field day duty) and the revolution that we were a part of. I believe it as surely as I believe that every woman has the right to determine the best possible solution for her "work, play, live" balance and that she should enjoy the journey and not worry so much about the destination.

Lauren Cassel Brownell is the Consulting Group Director for Hybrid Mom Consulting and Media Group and a freelance writer. Her book, Zen and the Art of Housekeeping: The Path to Finding Meaning in Your Cleaning, is available nationwide. If you do not run out and buy a copy immediately, you should feel very, very guilty!