
It's not as if Jon and Kate Gosselin and their brood weren't without controversy to begin with. Even fans of the show have balked at its most recent season, complaining that Jon & Kate Plus Eight is no longer about a family's day-to-day struggle to manage the chaos, but about the publicity machine that the family has become.
And now Jon is having an affair--if you believe any of the tabloid stories out this week, that is. And yes, some of them feature photos.
Jon has vehemently denied that anything inappropriate occurred between him and 23-year-old teacher Deanna Hummel, who he claims is just a friend. And Kate? Well, she's not mincing words (Does she ever?) about where the blame for all this drama lies, and she's not letting Jon off the hook, either. She told Entertainment Weekly, "It's disturbing and unfortunate that these tabloids have gone as far as they have to try and bring us down. Jon's poor judgment and irresponsible behavior has also without a doubt caused some added tension and stress between the two of us."
Yikes.
Kate's comment is disconcerting for a few reasons, but let's start with this one: If Jon is telling the truth and this woman really is just a friend, is he really displaying such poor judgment? What's so awful about hanging out with a friend? Clearly Kate is referencing all of Jon's recent behavior, which includes drinking with co-eds at a bar, and not just the alleged affair. (While all of this was happening, Kate was out of town promoting her new book.) By calling the behavior irresponsible, though, she's clearly stating that something inappropriate happened. The second issue is that she admits that it's causing tension between her and her husband. Again, if nothing serious happened, there's no reason for tension.
The show itself draws much of its drama from the fact that Kate is a pretty intense personality, from her cleaning/organizing compulsions to her insistence on criticizing and interrupting her husband at every turn. There are legions who watch the show simply because they love hating Kate.
For the Kate haters, this story is almost poetic in its juiciness: Put-upon dad of eight and husband of one crazy lady gets to escape all of his various responsibilities in one fell swoop, and with a 23-year-old, no less. Hummel's brother has come forward saying that Jon Gosselin and his sister had loud sex in their house. A bar employee has gone on the record saying that he saw Jon and Hummel kissing. People who are claiming insider information, no matter who they support--whether it's college kids at the bar or hotel security guards--can barely contain their glee.
But what no tabloid has had the guts to just say, even though it lurks in just about every story, is this: Kate deserved it. She treats her husband badly and he feels pressured and overburdened, so he cheated on her. And if you think no one is saying this, think again. Here's feedback from
our own interview with Kate Gosselin, which was conducted before rumors of the affair surfaced:
"I would never treat my husband the way she treats Jon. She has always gotten her way and now she is out of control. I don't want their marriage to break up but I would like to see Jon step up and become the man of the house." --mickey
"[She's] awful to her husband and she berates him in front of the kids. It's awful! I hear her yelling through stores at him and I can't believe he puts up with it! --anonymous
"Jon woke up... now he is going out on his own. Way to go, Jon. I know he would never leave the kids but , I do believe [Kate] would." --jude
"[Kate] demeans her husband at every opportunity. She's lucky he's wimpy enough to take it all." --Benay
"Jon is a saint to put up with her!" --N
"Kate is not the great person. She constantly puts her husband down in front of others. Her loving husband takes care of those kids alone without complaint." --Shirley
"The one thing I do notice is that [Kate is] very rude to her husband. She talks down to him and is always correcting him. I can tell by the look on his face that he is very embarrassed and hurt. I realize you have a very stressful life, but some marriages break up just because of those reasons. Has she ever thought of how much harder life would become if Jon left?" --Concerned in Calif.
Other commenters noted that Kate might be cranky and critical, but she also does the lion's share of managing the Gosselin household--no small task with eight children, no matter how many corporate freebies the family receives. If she relaxed a little, as our readers seem to think she should, how would her family fare? Would they fall to pieces? Or would Kate just seem irresponsible and disorganized--a scenario that harkens to another famous mom of multiples, mommy train wreck Nadya Suleman. And we all know how people feel about her. In all of this mess, it's Kate who just can't win.
For a story that's all about Jon--the
Us magazine cover story promises to tell details of Jon and Hummel's "cheap first date"--so much of this story is really about Kate, the decision to raise a large family and expectations for men at home. If you're following the tabloids, the message is a little scary. While Dad was off drinking with co-eds, where was mom? She was out of town working.
--Laura Motta
Producer, Momtourage
I think this is so sad. How can anyone be happy that Jon may have cheated? I really hope that he didn't. If this rumor is true, a family may be torn apart. And no, Kate does NOT deserve to be cheated on. This just makes me sick that anyone would say she "deserved it'. I just hope this rumor turns out to be false...for the sake of those kids and the family.
I dont care how mean she is, no respectful 32 year old man with 8 kids needs to be at a bar till 2:00 in the morning with a 23 year old woman!
Very well said. Beyond the tabloid take, the blame, the judgment -- the real story of the stress and strain marriages with small children undergo is there. Jon's not the only man to look for adoration and self-worth in another's eyes if he isn't feeling that at home. Kate's not the only woman whose love and respect for her husband gets lost in the pressure and the chores and the diapers. It happened to me too. Both people feel like "they're doing it all" and the resentment builds and builds to breaking. The most common time for a divorce to occur is w/ i 2 years of having a child happens for a reason. What married couples with young children, 1 child or 8, is help and support from family and friends. A village. Every couple needs a break. And if they don't get it, well they take it where they can to the destruction of all involved. This nuclear family going it alone scenerio just doesn't work. Bring on the Momtourage!
This situation is unfortunate, and I am appaulled that anyone finds infidelity is DESERVED! My parents are dealing with infidelity and it tears families apart. These poor children are so young, and are unable to avoid hearing these horrible "rumors" about their father. This is a very sad situation for their family, and anyone who is enjoying in their pain needs to seek a therapist. It is just discusting!
She is out of town"working"...LOL! She is "appearing". She is playing celebrity. Getting dressed up and having people clamor for her autograph.
No, the question is, "where are the kids?"! Who is watching the kids while dad is out all night in his sports car, and mom is playing celebrity, being driven around in a limo? After all these two would have nothing, not one dime, if not for those 6 kids. They are the reason Octomom exists!
No woman deserves to be cheated on. Period. If Jon was having trouble dealing with the publicity and/or the marriage he should have been acting like an adult and talking to her about it. Or maybe they could spend some of the money they're making on couples therapy. How does anyone deserve to be cheated on? Your husband is supposed to be your support and your best friend, breaking someones trust like that is beyond cruel. No matter how I or anyone else feels about Kate, she absolutely did not deserve this. It's sick to think people would say and actually believe that. I think the statements she's made about this situation have been flawless. It's nobody's business whats going on between her and her husband. She handles it well, and is dealing with things on her own. Also, he absolutely did something inappropriate, whether or not he cheated. Married men have no business being out, without their wives...and with another woman, until 2am. Did he hire a babysitter for his 8 children so he could go out and get wasted? How mature. Kate does her best, Jon is acting like a teenager.
Let's see the rest of you try having 8 kids and see how well your marriages hold up and how well you act while trying to shop for a family of 10 while you have 8 kids in tow including 6 toddlers...Cut them both some slack! Even if he is having an affair, which I do not condone, that is between them....leave it alone! As for her being out of town and him being at a bar...she was working because she was making money for the family. He was taking a much-needed break and having a drink - he's a grown man over 21 and perfectly entitled to go have a drink while he has a babysitter, especially if he's going to the bar accompanied by coeds.
No one would EVER balk at a husband's being out of town for work, but somehow Kate's working out of town is wrong? She's being a bad mother by providing for her family?
I don't watch the show so I don't know anything about their family, but even if she is overbearing, that doesn't give him carte blanche to cheat on her. And if you think it does, think about all the times you've been a bitch and see if you think your husband deserves some extra marital sex for putting up with you.
Uhg, it's all from the book of WHO CARES???? I don't watch their show, but am bombarded by commercials for it during other shows on the same channel. I can't imagine what it's like being in their marriage. No one deserves to be cheated on, period. Yes, it SHOULD be a private matter. However, this couple chooses to let TV cameras into their home how many days of the month? They are public about finances, home buying, vacations, child rearing, and all sorts of things most families keep private. So, be careful what you wish for. The true victims of all of it are their children.
I feel so much sadness for this family and these children. i can only hope that they decide to cancel the show and try to put their family back together. these children are so precious. i hope the parents go into marriage counseling. it is a crime that Kate's own brother is trashing her in the media. I don't care if it is all true, family shouldn't do that to family. I'm going to pray for the Gosselins.
This show is FAKE, FAKE, FAKE... did I say FAKE!! It was ok in the very beginning.... but not anywhere near that level now. Kate has run Jon into the ground by belittling him, so she ran him off into the arms of another woman. No they are NOT raising these kids on their own- THINK... nannies, most likely more than one. This isn't reality people- WAKE UP!
I also think prayers are need for this family along with all the families that are going through a similar situation. Marriage has taken a back burner once children are born. There's soccer practice, dentist and doctor appointments, school plays, dance class, band concerts etc. It's hard with 2 or 3 kids, imagine if you had 8!!
I agree that Kate doesn't always treat Jon nicely but in no way is that a reason to cheat! Nothing justifies cheating - EVER.
What this family needs is to get the cameras out of their house and go to counseling. Hopefully, if there was infidelity on either part, they can learn to forgive and focus on what brought them together in the first place- for their sakes and the children's.
All "reality" shows are not 100% reality- there are a lot of fake smiles and situations just to make it look good -and this show proves it.
i hope they get it worked out as well as the millions of others in the world that have a family on the rocks.
I think you should leave them alone and let them handle their life. they are great people who let us share in their life. Good Luck Jon and Kate hold strong. I have a 2yr old my other boys are 28,25,22. so watching your show helps me get ready for the next steps and i learn alot from you. thank you again and keep on loving each other.. please dont let this crap get to you we love all of you
"Kate deserved it"?
Really?
That's a very awful statement to make that anyone would "deserve" to be cheated on.
Kate has a book coming out?
Hmmm...Isn't this what celebrities do? If they want something to sell well, they make a big stink so they are popular and people buy their stuff. True or not, they are making money doing the show and will make more money on the book. Money is what it comes down to.
Whether it's a "true" issue or one made to look true so they are "in the news;"
"in the news "= book sales $$$$$$$.
I have to say this because its been bothering me for to long, yes they are in the public eye with their show, and it was their decision to be filmed. But when is enough enough?? This is a real FAMILY with real problems can we please just let them be in peace and let them fight for their marriage without the media intervening!? It saddens me because there are children involved and that is what I think is escaping everyone, there are little ones that are going to be affected by this, who's to say if they haven't been affected already the yelling that goes on between them. But we just need to let them fight for their marriage and leave them alone. Yes Kate does scream and yell and get upset about little things but what mom/wife hasn't gotten upset about the littlest thing in life?? It happens people fight and bicker and snap back and forth to one another........its called marriage. I just pray that they can work it out and that Jon will find his way back to being a dad and a husband again.
Deserved it? How can you say such a thing? Yes, she was off promoting her book, but their celebrity is what gives them the means to support such a large family. Secondly, I'm not crazy about how Kate talks to Jon or her children for that matter, however, Jon knew what he was marrying and you kinda have to be a bit of a control freak to manage a family of 10.
With those kinds of stresses and pressures, I'm not surprised that Jon got caught up in something that seems better than what's he got. I'm sure he'll soon regret his decision, if he hasn't already.
Crazy thing is, women are always the ones making excuses for men cheating on their wives. Why? Do we have such latent dislike/disrespect for ourselves that we feel on some level we just "deserve" it? These people have 8 kids together, 8! How can any woman deserve that? The amount of stress in that household must be completely off the scale. I have three children and my husband and I are often sniping at each other or rude to each other simply because we are totally overwhelmed. Marraige is not about being there when its good, and stepping out on your partner when it gets bad. Remember those pesky vows? For better or worse? So ridiculous that in this current age, so many terrible things happening all over, that anyone would make excuses or support a man having sex with a coed, walking away from his family in order to pursue a single existence and leave his wife holding the bag while taking care of 8 small children, is simply sickening.
I also cannot believe people would think Kate deserves to be cheated on. She does take care of everything in their home and is ultimately the one responsible for nearly every decision. If Jon wants part of that responsibility, he can step up and take it. He can show Kate she has no reason to belittle him by stepping it up.
Seriously? She deserved it? I'm sorry- NO ONE deserves to be cheated on. NO ONE!!! If he is unhappy, he knows where the door is. He puts up w/ her crap. No one forces him to.
What a mean, spiteful blog. I'm very sad that someone would publish such hateful things about someone they've never met and that iVillage would publish a link to it. Everyone has their own faults in a marriage and if this is even true, there are two sides to the story.
i think it's pathetic. pathetic that he would take this means to stand up for himself. why not just have a discussion about the way he is being treated rather than turn to another woman (if this is true). how about those poor children. if he is such a loving and caring father, then why wouldn't he have stopped and thought about how all this would affect them. i feel for them and i feel for kate. you can't have 2 wishy washy parents in one family. someone needed to be in charge and it was her.
if people out there wished a normal life for these kids, then they got it. given the divorce rate, this is sadly becoming the norm.
and for all those that are happy that this happened to kate i think that just as pathetic as the whole situation! why would anyone take pleasure in someone elses pain. remember that when you're going through a difficult situation. the thought that someone out there is glad that you are suffering rather that praying for you to rise above this hardship.
I feel sorry for those poor children!!! I used to love the show but now im not so sure, with all the drama being conjured up by the media and portraying Jon as being innocent and that he had reasons to cheat, he is not that innocent, if anything he should be ashamed of himself what is he teaching his girls by going out and prancing around with a much younger lady. I dont like that they are trashing Kate, I feel for her because of the fact that she has had to endure all this critisism, be under the watchful eye and scrutiny of media attention, all while juggling her difficult pregnancy then having to deal with her post partum and then daily care of the kids with help or without, couple that together with the fact that Jon works and is not there 24/7 with the kids like she is. Most women know how challenging it is just to raise one or two kids, never mind 8, cudos to Kate, here is hoping that they get the help they need and hopefully keep it out of the spotlight for the sake of those little cuties!!
If she was just a friend, why hasn't Kate met her? If nothing is going, then theirs nothing to hide. I love the show. I love Jon. I love Kate. Their family is great. I hope they can work things out.
I agree with everyone here who said "NO ONE deserved to be cheated on" So many men out there are claiming "stress" as a reason to cheat, but usually the same family stress is on the other partner and yet they stay faithful to the end. Its really a matter of self control. If you are an adult you ought to be mature enough to stop yourself from going that far. I do understand needing someone else to talk to , I get that, but why does it have to go into physical stuff? They can't help themselves??? What a load of crap. If you REALLY feel your marriage is over, fine, leave then AND after the divorce is final then you can start whoring around. And yes, you guessed it I have been through this before. My first husband left me with five small children alone with no support in a small town where I was hundreds of miles from family and friends. He also admitted to other cheating while my baby girl was in the hospital! She was waiting for a liver transplant and we took turns sleeping at the hospital with her (of course it was usually me). He used the time he had to sneak out after she fell asleep so he could go be with his girlfriend, and yet to this day claims that HE did nothing wrong...it was JUST stress.
I wish the best for Jon and Kate of course but I have no soft spot in my heart for cheaters PERIOD!
I love watching the show, but I have to ask this question...they make it seem like church is such a big part of their life, but the bible strictly says that the man is the ruler of the household and the woman is his "helpmate". Kate should not be wearing the pants in the relationship, if she is, it's partly Jon's fault for letting her. That being said, I hope they don't get divorced, that's not what any family needs, especially a family with 8 children. It saddens me that people out there think Kate deserved this. Nobody deserves that, if you are that unhappy in a relationship talk to your partner, or seek counseling, don't find someone else and sneak around behind their back. That's just not right, nobody deserves that and anyone that feels otherwise obviously hasn't been on Kate's side of the equation.
Ever since the show began,Jon seems to have a "whatever" attitude. If it weren't for Kate there to get things done and keep things organized,it wouldn't get done. Everyone is so quick to jump on Kate,but Jon needs to grow up. Everyone jumps on her for going on a book tour,but that book helps keep interest in the show,not to mention profits from the book.Keeping interest in the show keeps them money so Jon doesn't have to grow up. He has no business being out that late at night with ANYONE while neither of them are with the kids.
Its absolutly ABSURD to write that anyone in a marriage deserves to be cheated on! Jon knew who he was marrying and vowed NEVER to do that. Marriage and a family is so much work and I only have 2 kids! Men need a lot of direction. God bless her. I couldnt even iamgine the gut wrenching pain I would be in if I found out something like that about my hubby, esp so publicly. I guess they who made those deserving comments must be those "perfect" wives.
I am in no way condoning Jon's supposed affair but I have to admit I was not at all surprised. Kate quite honestly treats her husband like crap and when a person is in a marriage that they are not happy in (not to mention the whole world was witnessing her verbal abuse towards him and seeing how much of a whipping boy he is) adultery tends to happen. If these allegations are correct, I really hope that they are able to work things out and be happy together. Maybe this whole ordeal will put things in perspective for the both of them. I would just hate to see such a huge family be torn apart.
I'M A MOTHER OF 2 KIDS AND COULDN'T IMAGINE HAVING 8 LITTLES ONES. I AM TIRED OF EVERYBODY BLAMMING KATE. KATE WOULDN'T HAVE TO BE BOSSY IF SHE HAD A MAN INSTEAD OF A KID. EVERYBODY IS SAYING POOR JON , AND EVERYBODY IS BAD MOUTHING KATE BECAUSE SHE IS TO BOSSY AND MEAN, THATS WHY HE HAD AFFAIR. NO HE NEEDS TO GROW UP, TAKE RESPONABILITY AND TAKE CARE OF HIS FAMILY HE WANTED KIDS. YES I WOULD LOVE TO GET BREAKS AND DO THINGS WITHOUT KIDS SOMETIMES BUT SOMETIMES YOU CANT BUT DOESNT GIVE HIM THE RIGHT TO CHEAT AND GO TO BARS. THATS SHOWING IF TIMES ARE ROUGH ,GO DRINK AND HAVE AFFAIRS. BECAUSE I CANT HANDLE BEING MARRIED AND KIDS. SENDING OUT WRONG MESSAGE TO YOUR KIDS AND VIEWERS. KATE IS TAKING ON THE ROLL OF MOM AND DAD BEING SHE IS RAISEING 9 INSTEAD OF 8. YOU CANT JUST QUIT BECAUSE THINGS ARE SO NOT YOUR WAY . JON GROW UP BE A MAN. THE KIDS ARE THE ONES PAYING FOR IT. GOD BLESS ALL.
I so agree with Heidi. If Jon would be more helpful at home with out Kate "bossing" him to do what needs to be done, then Kate wouldn't seem so mean on the show. Men like Jon need to be told how to help around the house. Otherwise, how can one mom cook, clean, take care of the childern, do the laundry, the grocery shopping....etc. all by herself without the support of the husband. If the affair rumors are true, then poor kids and Kate. No one should be feeling sad for Jon. He's an ADULT! He should have handled his marriage problems with words other than going out to a bar with a "FRIEND!" I feel sorry for those kids.
this isn't anybody's business. let them deal with this privately since they're the only ones who really know what's going on in there relationship
i want to see them pull through and I honestly hope that all of this is not true. Those poor kids do not deserve this. The two older ones are like what 9 or 10. I hate the idea that they are going to school and probably having to hear about this junk. I agree with Melinda this is nobody's business but I pray to God that they will make it.
I dont think that Kate is in the wrong the way shes acts, sometimes I feel like the show should be called Kate plus 9 the way he acts sometimes, Shes right there is time to play once the work is done and if he would help then it would get done twice as fast and then they both could play
What is so sad is the kids. I can't really tell yet if this is a publicity ploy for the show or not, but if it isn't, The kids will look back at these articles someday and that will be pathetic.
And if my "brother" and "sister-in-law" decided to gain money from my families torture, I would definitely disown them. I don't think Kate was wrong for kicking them out of their lives, they've shown their true colors now.
here's what is so sad. people see themselves in this show, they "relate" as if this couple gives a crap. it's a freakin' TV show, both those people are morons. you don't get mom of the year awards because 8 babies crawled out of your uterus. "octomom" is universally despised because, OMG, she has too many kids! wow, I wish huggies, pampers, gerber, the gap, formula companies, book publishers and who knows what else came knocking because I was pregnant. no one offers me free plastic surgery, free trips and pays me to talk about where my hubby points his dipstick! enough of these shows about people whose only contribution to the planet is managing to make infertility a money maker.
Um...is she really raising those kids by herself? REALLY? I'm prettty sure she has a little help there, what with all the camera crew in their house. I have a friend who has 10 kids, and very little help. She homeschools her kids and her husband works hard. Those kids are very well-behaved. She and her husband are raising those kids without any freebies and without any cameras in their house.
Kate and Jon agreed to have these people in their house, and now they have to live with all the crap that comes with it. I think these two "adults" are selfish and are exploiting those kids. I feel sorry for those kids NOT the adults of that household.
Her whole family is preditory. That father of hers complaining HARD about his $150,000/year salary.
Now we all know where she gets it.
Should be automated anyways. You let the blacks in New Orleans off. An advanced topic. You should focus on the basics first.
Barely skilled labor.
Reincarnated as milking cows, ironically.
The enemy within.
You don't understand how unions hurt people's relationship with the Gods. But this is too is advanced.