And so the calm conversation disintegrates into "you never let me have anything I want" and "I am just going to get the snack I want myself and you can't stop me" and "you are making me VERY angry, mommy!" until I finally tell her to go to her room until dinner is ready because I have nothing left to say about the matter and I don't want to listen to her temper tantrum.

Age five at our house has seen a dramatic uptick in the number of moments like this. Annie's increasing verbal and reasoning skills have upped the ante so I'm not just listening to wailing but engaged in a battle of wills that requires careful attention to my own words and sparring style. Anything can and will be used against me in the court of my daughter, or so it seems.

These battles have left me feeling apprehensive about those looming teenage years. I know I've got a bit less than a decade to figure this out, but if five is a precursor of what's to come, Annie and I are in for a bumpy ride. How will those relatively simple arguments about snacks manifest into real, important discussions about schoolwork, responsibility, friends and social lives? Will I be able to effectively negotiate the choppy waters of adolescence if I'm already exhausted by a pint-sized junk food attorney?

I can only hope that the awesome relationship we've created over the years (when we aren't arguing about snacks, bedtime, picking up, getting ready, etc) will see us through those rough patches, just the way they do now. And that a good snuggle on the couch still works when she's 15.

But, in all seriousness, how do moms of older kids handle the increasing complexity and emotional sophistication of their children? Any great books to recommend? Tricks to share?