Results tagged “recession” from Momtourage: Blogger Knows Best

He sees you when you're sleeping he knows when you're awake...is it your friendly neighborhood stalker??...noooooo it's Santa!  But he sure sounds scary!  I was helping my friend Lea potty train 3 year old Gwen, yesterday and I got her (the baby not my friend) to sit on the potty with the promise of toys from Santa if she made pee pee for me.  I was desperate, can you tell?  Lea is really anxious for baby Gwen to be potty trained because Lea has to return to work.  Gwen will be going to day care while dad re-trains.  Another victim of the recession, Lea's husband was let go from his job last week.  So, not only is this recession depressing the crap out of people it's forcing toddlers to make ones on potties too!!  Darn it!  "Job Training and Potty Training Go Hand In Hand"  You'll never see that headline in Newsweek.  So, there she was (the baby not my friend) sitting on the potty playing with her toys....but with no toiletting success.

  Tonight, it's Friday and for the first time in a long time, this Funny Mom comedian doesn't have a gig!!  Yes, for a change I'm going to be home and I'm sooooo loving it.  So tonight, we've made a plan to do pizza and bowling with our 6 year old.  She's bringing her friend Madison along so it should be fun.  I know, Madison, not a fan of the name either but the kid is great.  I also don't like the name Brooklyn...I'm like really?? which neighborhood??  What's next, here's my daughter Park Avenue??  Our son Murray Hill??  Which is just an expression people there are no hills in Manhattan so get rid of all those SUVs for gods sake!  Any rate, bowling is cheap (and I have a coupon...so sexy) so it should be a fun night.  My husband can kick back and enjoy a beer.....or as our daughter refers to it....daddy soda.  We're in a recession and he just started his new part time job (there are no full time ones available yet....hello, can you say lagging economy??), so bowling with a coupon will just have to do.  No wonder Netflix stock keeps going up.  Don't our lives sound glamorous?  Just like a TV show?.....yeah Roseanne.  But it'll be fun.  As long as we're together we'll have a good time.  What inexpensive activities are you enjoying with your family these days??

Earthquakes, tsunamis, rising unemployment, (my husband is still unemployed 7 months later - so sexy) the economy, failing industries, the health care crisis, global warming, Detroit.  Have you heard enough?  Are you ready to just drive your hybrid car into a tree already?...wait a minute.  We need that tree.  Try driving into a Walmart...that would make us all feel a bit better...just avoid the greeter.  She's probably somebody's grandma and most likely the primary child care provider in her household.  As if all this isn't bad enough, we received some more troubling news yesterday:  Lily is receiving extra help in Math and Reading during school.  What?!  I thought she was doing so well in her new school? 

  Every parenting expert out there warns us not to engage in food battles with our children because it's one of the few places they can exert their control and we'll lose.  Lily has suddenly at the age of 6 begun a nightly ritual of refusing dinner.  I'm of the belief that 'forcing' them to eat is a waste of time and energy.  Life is just too short for all that conflict.  My philosophy has always been, I'm not making her a special meal she eats what we eat and if she doesn't and wants a snack later - tough, no way.  Too bad.  Eat your dinner.  However, last night, I had to work and wasn't around to supervise.  Apparently, my husband gave in and quicky replaced her pork chop with chicken.  I was livid!!  I'm surprised he just didn't give her ice cream for dinner. (I can see it.)  Whatever happened to I have your back?!

My gal pal has breast fed her new baby girl for the first 6 months of her life and now she is switching to formula (and still pumping) because she's going back to work...unless you know of a great wet nurse.  That could be the new recession proof career!  She feels so guilty about not being able to nurse for at least 18 months as she did her first two however, I say she's lucky to have had this time with her.  With the current male-cession (it's mostly men out of work), women are putting in longer and longer days.  It feels like years since any of my friends have been able to breast feed longer than 6 weeks.  Nevertheless, the baby is experiencing nipple confusion so mom is feeling even guiltier about her decision.  I keep reminding her, you do what you can when you can.  Just think, if she stays home from work and loses her job then she and the baby can spend endless hours starig into each others eyes.....in the park....in their tent....'cause they'll be homeless.  Do what you can when you can ladies and when you can't, there's always Dr.Browns.  Anybody have any other bottles to recommend for nipple confusion??.....my husband still suffers from it.  (ha ha)

This year, with soooo many people unemployed and the number only rising, take the time to really enjoy the simple things this 4th of July.  Like the freedom to read this blog and not have your text messaging stopped by pro-government, anti populist forces (hello....Iran).   More importantly, really enjoy the company of your friends and family in particular your munchkins.  No matter what age they are they'll always be our munchkins.  And yes it's loaded with carbs but it's only potato salad.  Eat it for gods sake.  You can go back to the gym....or Harry.....or however you work off those calories on Monday.  Happy birthday America.

Here's the latest in what I call extreme toys:  a scooter that creates sparks.  Here's the description of it from Amazon verbatim: "Adding a bit of spark to the original kick scooter, the Razor Spark has modified its A2 scooter with a foot controlled, detachable Spark Bar to light up your ride. The Spark Scooter's spark cartridge creates 20 percent more sparks than other brands on the market thanks to its 5 flint pads. A bonus spark cartridge is included."  Flint pads have been added to a child's toy??!!  Are these toy manufacturers insane??  Did this thing come from China?  Lead based toothpaste, Thalate in baby bottles....it's not a stretch to think China's trying to destroy us.  Maybe it was Al Qaeda?  Sounds like an old Saturday Night Live sketch doesn't it?:  "Here's a great toy for the kids.....Johnny Blow Torch....or how about a bag of broken glass!"  And I thought Pee And Poo Plush toys were ridiculous.  Whoever came up with this latest idea had their head firmly rooted up their a$$.  I smell a recall.  Reeecalllllaaaaa........think Ricola cough drops.

I had the surgical procedures (on May 22nd) to correct all the fertility problems associated with Endometriosis.  It's almost two weeks since I had the surgery and I'm still sore.  I was assured I'd heal quickly but I think Lily being home sick from school all last week didn't help.  It's hard to heal when you're cleaning up vomit....every 2 hours.  I went for my follow-up exam yesterday and was quite surprised to hear what my doctor advised.......

As you may or may not know, my husband is no longer gainfully employed in the financial world....and I'm sure will never be again....at least at the level he was.  A few weeks ago, I wrote a piece here about it and I have been talking about it onstage.  I've been talking about his desire to go back to school to become a nurse (and when I say his desire I mean my desire for him) - to have a recession proof job.  Well, a news producer with ABC heard me talk about it onstage and caught the article that was done on us in the Financial Times, and they filmed a segment on us that will most likely air this Monday, May 4th, on World News with Charles Gibson between 6:30 - 7:00pm.  We were interviewed by Dan Harris.  Please tune in!  If for some reason it doesn't air Monday most likely it will air Tuesday, May 5th, same time same bat channel.  Have a great weekend!

At least three days a week after school at the playground, we buy Lily (and at least 2 of her friends) popsicles from the ice cream truck.  They're pretty cheap - only $3.00 a day for 4 small popsicles.  However, since my husband was laid off....again....I've been taking a hard look at our finances.  Fortunately, I've been busier than ever however, we need to be more careful with money.  We still have $3 for popsicles but should we be spending $9 a week on popsicles from the truck when they're cheaper to buy from the supermarket? I don't think so. 

You know, it isn't only the fat cats on Wall Street who have become synonymous with greed and excess these days.....self-important celebrities are right up there too with the overpaid and undeserving.  Today, I learned that Oprah just penned a deal with XM Satellite Radio for $55 Million.  

 "Obama said he hopes the terrorists don't follow us home, but if they do, and they want to bring down a building, the CitiCorp Center is at Lexington and 53rd." --Bill Maher

I have always tried to shield my child and other children from bad news or tragedy....which both apply to this economy.  However, there are some invaluable lessons to be learned from the current global financial crisis.  My in-laws, frugal as they are (admittedly sometimes embarrassingly so), grew up in the post-depression era Midwest.  Consequently, they really know how to squeeze a penny and have never lived beyond their means.  They, like my Hungarian refugee father, live by the mantra, "If I don't have the cash I can't afford it."  Very wise words indeed. 

Again, I don't know where my friend finds these photos but everytime she sends them my way I feel the need to share them with you.  This one brought a much needed chuckle as I received it the moment the current wave of job losses was announced.  I don't know which is worse - his legs (or just that stance??!!), those wings or that wall in need of a power washing.  Laugh it up people.  Comedy is a much needed remedy in these times.

Considering our bleak economy (or at least that's what the media war drum keeps beating), the war and all the job losses this past year, I made it very clear to many of our friends that we are no longer exchanging gifts for Christmas & Hanuhkah.  I explained that not only were we doing it for monetary reasons but to reduce stress levels (mine, as I do ALL the shopping) and to emphasize "less is more" for our children (or at least my child).  I explained that we'd much rather spend time with our friends and loved ones this holiday season (and from now on) rather than money. 

I was at Old Navy yesterday, and they're already pumping Christmas music throughout the store!  It was so freakin' depressing.  I was like, OMG!  Did I oversleep and miss Thanksgiving?  I didn't even buy my cards yet!  I know the economy is slow so retailers feel they have to do the 'big push' thing for the holiday season but they just pushed me out the door with this.  Where are the Veteran's Day sales this year?  That one always makes me queasy:  Celebrate Veterans Day, skip the parade, just go to the Parade of Shoes.  Now you can have a purple coat to match your purple heart.  The next uncomfortable shopping event after Christmas:  The End Of Guantanamo Bay Sale.....slippers, gloves, hats, stuff to make your long trip back home a comfy one.

"When we were kids we couldn't afford vacations but my mother's Jewish so we went on guilt trips instead...they last so much longer too."
 -- SherryDavey

Two weeks ago I did a gig at a beach club on Fire Island.  It didn't pay that well in dollars but what it did pay well in was free hotel rooms....a currency I'm all for.  So, we left Lily on the main land with our in-laws and headed off with some friends for a night of laughing, dancing and recharging (left to right:  moi; Dan; and fellow comedian Vicky Kuperman). 

Above right was our view on the ferry over to Fire Island.  We kicked back with some diet cokes (we're all on Weight Watchers so we chose to save our points for something much more satisfying than beer....chocolate) and just stared off into the distance for a dose of late day vitamin D.  With the economy and our savings accounts all being in the state they're in, this was the perfect alternative to the stay-cation.  Getting away with friends or just that one special friend (let's hope it's your husband or wife) even for one night is just what the doctor ordered for parents.  Believe it or not, the kids could probably use a break from us too.

Where have you been this summer?  Got any stories of the perfect staycation or daycations to share? 

OMG!  I went to our local Keyfood this morning just to pick up a few items, 5 in fact, and the total came to $29.73.  I was so shocked I made the Express Line cashier (who now really hates me) void out the order and do it again.  I hate that she chews her gum so loudly and then snarls into that awful microphone, "Manager to express register."  Much to my chagrin and disappointment, the total was the same - $29.73 for: cookies (one package); breakfast sausages; milk; scallions; and organic apple juice!  Holy crap people!  Now that I'm a mom, I find myself running to the store every day to pick up some item I've run out of.  Looks like I'll run out of money first.  I don't know about a full on recession but I think it's say to say that inflation is way on the rise. 

Have you noticed prices going up on everything as well?  I know we're getting hammered at the pump but what about everywhere else too?   Share your latest sticker shock with your fellow fleeced parents, misery loves company. 

How much do you spend on groceries for you and your family each week?

• Under $50
• Between $50 and $100
• More than $100