Results tagged “stress” from Momtourage: Blogger Knows Best

These days I'm running on the life treadmill and I can't seem to turn the damn thing off, or even slow it to a comfortable pace. I'm racing from one thing to the next - work, appointments, school actitivities, after school activities, chores... the list goes on. I try to keep it all together but there are so many things that lie scattered on the road behind me, unfinished. I stay up too late, get up too early and still, another day is done before I turn around.

I have to say, the phrase necessity is the mother of invention is very true....now more than ever.  Years ago, when my husband was unemployed and I could no longer go on the road for weeks doing comedy, my mom comedian friends (Karen Morgan and Nancy Witter) and I put together our mommy-centric theatrical comedy experience Mama's Night Out.  Three years later, I'm thrilled to report Mama's are selling out theatres all over the country.  We saw a niche and came up with a product to fill it.  We had to.  We're not bragging.  There were simply no producers out there willing to take on three non-famous, over forty-something (two of us overweight too) moms.  So we produced ourselves, got a manager, eventually an agent and years later here we are. 

per.mis.sive - adjective 1. habitually or characteristically accepting or tolerant of something, as social behavior or linguistic usage, that others might disapprove or forbid. 

As I posted earlier today, my husband is very anti-Christmas including the decorations.  So, to reduce seasonal stress I try to use ones that won't depress him too much and cause him to fly off into one of his 'it's so commercial' rants (I call them Blitzen Fits).  See our peace frog and Christmas Lobster....definitely not Kosher for my side of the family.  One thing we both agree on:  we both detest those giant, outdoor, snow globe things that use a fan to blow bits of styrofoam around encased Santas or Snowmen.  It's like, "Oh look, Santa's got respiratory problems."  Weird and such a waste of electricity.

I was at the mall yesterday and realized something, I just don't have the money nor the patience this year for the holidays.  I'm so behind on shopping and we didn't even take our holiday photo yet either.  However, for the first time,......I'm not really bothered by it all.  I really could care less.  We just wrote a check this morning for $2k to our adoption agency so that's where our money is really going this year.  I think that would be a much better present to the family anyway - a new life rather than a new pair of gloves.  So I need to make it down to Washington soon to get a Christmas bail out because we've only got $600 this year and this is how far it has to be stretched:  12 presents; 6 birthday presents; tips for the babysitter, manicurist, aerobics instructor, teacher, mail man, crossing guard; and a new bike for Lily's b-day on the 22nd.  Oh...and I won't be taking the family jet either....I'll just drive down in my 97 Corolla with the broken door now that gas prices are so low.....

Every year on Black Friday, some store offers crazy discounts (like a laptop for $50) to the first 5 shoppers (or some other number) which always results in angry mobs crushing some poor soul.  This year, the Walmart in Valley Stream, NY gets this prestigious honor but every year it's the same story.  We can't whine that it's the economy because this has been happening for years.  I provided commentary on this very topic for Court TV , check out the link to my clips.  Why do people feel the need to get up at 3am for these so-called Door Buster deals??  Don't they know it's just a ruse to get you in the door?  That they only have one or two of these items?  What happens to people around the holidays that makes them so crazy?  Is it the fruitcake?  Is it the endless, awkward hours spent with family?  Is it the cards?  They never stop coming.  It's not Sarah Palin anymore.  During the election, sometimes I'd feel like stampeding a mall after listening to her speak.  What possesses people?

I'm not the even hosting the family Thanksgiving Dinner this year but that doesn't mean I won't be busy preparing my 'dishes' to bring:  sweet potato pies; biscuit wreath; and two Spaghetti Squash Casseroles.  My Thanksgiving To Do List was ridiculously unrealistic.  As of this morning:  it had 23 separate tasks listed.  So, I had a big glass of wine and took a deep breath.  I got rid of 14 tasks now there's only 9 left to do before Thursday morning.  I got rid of the 'doing laundry' one, heck that's what perfume is for and the 'baking cookies' one too (hello Shop Rite).  Now that I can handle.  Do you overschedule and multi-task too much too?  Tell me about it.

by Kris

I know that it's almost a year away and that I shouldn't even think, let alone worry, about it yet. But I am already nervous about going back to a 'regular job.' I have been home for almost six years, and while taking care of a household and two rowdy boys demands much time, energy, and organization, I feel completely of out of touch with the world of offices, memos, and morning meetings - a world that I successfully (if not always happily) inhabited for many years before becoming a stay-at-home mom.

Just in case you hadn't already heard, kids are giving other kids their custom-printed business cards. My husband mentioned it a few weeks ago. (He had read an article about it in the paper.) But after an initial snort of disbelief, my mind wandered to other things and I promptly forgot about it. Until yesterday, when 5 year old Sam received a card from a classmate.

When my boys were 1 and 2 years old I was pretty much a zombie. The constant feedings, diaper changes, cleaning and amusing (on top of my regular household chores) often seemed overwhelming. Most nights after I put them into bed, I would just get into bed myself, exhausted. I felt like I needed to conserve as much energy as possible in order to face the coming day.

And then a mom friend organized a weekly knitting night.

Despite all the turmoil in the markets, partisan politics and the war in Iraq, looking at pictures of Mr. & Mrs. Obama in their most "naked" moments - in front of crowds, cameras and all the rest of us - fills me with hope.  Their respectful, tender and encouraging pda-ing including "the bump", are an example of what true love and admiration really look like.  The usual pics of presidential candidates and their wives feature them holding hands and waving to the crowds.  They're clearly just another meaningless photo op.  This is quite different.  She's got his back - literally and philosophically.  Very refreshing.

A little girl comes home from her first day of school.  Her mother asks, "What did you learn today?"   The little girl replies, "Not enough. I have to go back tomorrow."

Lily, our five year old, is having trouble adjusting to the 'independent work' of first grade.  She's bright and is operating at grade level but is breaking down (and having trouble pulling it back together again) when she makes a mistake, misses a direction, or something else equally as minor.  She also needs a little prompting to keep up.  However, this is not unusual nor alarming....at least for me.  We just keep reassuring her of her intelligence and ability.  We are her support group...and the meetings are daily not weekly.

What I did today:
1) Dropped Sam off at his classroom. Accidentally bumped the poor kid who sits nearest the door while I wrestled Hank around the    corner.  Apologized and vowed to try harder to avoid him the next time.
2) Walked/carried Hank to the 'big library.' Noticed that my backpack was getting all sweaty and smelly again. Resolved to wash it more often - maybe even next week.
3) Shouted (oops) at Hank to "Stop running in the library!" Then realized I was shouting and tried to look innocuous.
4) Read enough of Treasure Trouble so that I wouldn't feel bad turning on the TV for Hank while I
5) Removed the disgusting, mildewed, ancient caulking (and some of the grout - oops again) from the tub. This has been on my to-do list for (shamefully) nearly a year.
6) Gave Hank a snack (ice cream!) and rushed him off to pre-K as I had underestimated the amount of time necessary to remove old caulk. And to organize a healthier snack.
7) Skipped going to the gym to eat delicious guacamole and chips with a friend and her cute, cute baby.
8) Started caulking the tub after wasting 20 minutes looking in my 'home help' books for advice about caulking. Apparently this subject is too easy to go into detail about.
9) Wondered why it takes so much force to get the caulk out of the tube. My hands hurt.
10) Noticed that it was time to pick up both boys. Had to pause in the middle of a tube.
11) Rushed the boys back to the house. Put on a Pippi Longstocking dvd (conveniently procured from the library that morning) while I struggled to finish. Note: It looks terrible but I did my best.
12) At the same time started caramelizing some onions for dinner. Only I turned the burner up too high to hurry them along.
13) Thought about how an ambulance went by today while I was eating guacamole and that I didn't think about the ambulances and firetrucks on 9/11/01, didn't tear up and feel that wave of fear for the first time, the first year. It's the first year that's happened with me.
14) I don't know if that's a good or a bad thing. I am thinking about it.

Okay so it's the first day of school and amidst all the drama of getting ready, (yes, there were some tears and nervous rants like, "I can't find my bloody hair clips mama!") Lily lost her second tooth!  She said, "There's something in my mouth."  It was her tooth!...hanging by what looked like a gruesome thread.  We quickly put it in an envelope under her pillow for the tooth fairy.  At least that's what I thought we did....

"When we were kids we couldn't afford vacations but my mother's Jewish so we went on guilt trips instead...they last so much longer too."
 -- SherryDavey

Two weeks ago I did a gig at a beach club on Fire Island.  It didn't pay that well in dollars but what it did pay well in was free hotel rooms....a currency I'm all for.  So, we left Lily on the main land with our in-laws and headed off with some friends for a night of laughing, dancing and recharging (left to right:  moi; Dan; and fellow comedian Vicky Kuperman). 

Above right was our view on the ferry over to Fire Island.  We kicked back with some diet cokes (we're all on Weight Watchers so we chose to save our points for something much more satisfying than beer....chocolate) and just stared off into the distance for a dose of late day vitamin D.  With the economy and our savings accounts all being in the state they're in, this was the perfect alternative to the stay-cation.  Getting away with friends or just that one special friend (let's hope it's your husband or wife) even for one night is just what the doctor ordered for parents.  Believe it or not, the kids could probably use a break from us too.

Where have you been this summer?  Got any stories of the perfect staycation or daycations to share? 

i am so fortunate to have found wonderful yoga teachers here in austin. so a shout out is in order to mandy who teaches from the anusara lineage, she encourages me to open up to grace and to "loop" my kidneys of all things! she is an alignment fanatic, and thinks nothing of pulling up her yoga pants above her knees to illustrate what the thigh looks like in "outer spiral".angela is a flat-out goddess! a generous soul with abundance of information about yogic philosophy, anatomy, and how to apply them to our practice. her familial, un-intimidating manner results in packed classes that feel like private lessons. she focuses me to notice how postures feel from the inside out and keeps my ego in check by reminding me that my ability to get into parsva bakasana doesn't make me a good person.

OMG!  I was watching CNN this morning and they were going on about the dangers of bunk beds.  Give me a break already!  Enough with the scare tactics and the crappy reporting and looking for stories where there are none.  If you are stupid enough to not properly install a bunk bed and then your child gets hurt then you should put your helmet back on, hop on the short bus and go very very far away.  And if your child hits their head on the bottom of the top bunk believe it or not, he/she will survive.  The fun they have with bunk beds far outweighs the dangers.  I'm surprised that bunk beds don't come with built-in safety straps for our litigious, neurotic society.

Bunk beds are dangerous if they're not installed properly?!  No sh**!  Tell me something I don't know.  So are training wheels and baby gates and other child safety devices.  Beware the dangers of the high chair!  Take a pill please.  I'm surprised the media didn't link bunk beds to terrorism:  Al Qaeda is lurking on the top bunk! 

In an effort to sell our triplex in Brooklyn, we're currently updating the walls and electrical fixtures.  We're into our second week of construction already, it's Tuesday morning 9:07am - none of the workmen are here yet and I'm ready to rip my eyes out.  And yes, my contractor is named Bob.  Every time he walks in the door I find myself humming that theme song.

Here are some pix of how it looks at the moment (I keep telling myself it's going to be fabulous when it's all finished):